Do you need healing emotionally, spiritually, physically? Find the root of abuse that has left you wounded and a victim to the enemy’s affliction.
Child: The abuser uses children to control or inflict pain on one’s partner, gives messages through a child, uses visitation rights as a way to harass, uses child to support as leverage, hurts a child in any way to cause pain to that child’s parent.
Isolation: The abuser controls someone else’s actions, interactions, and communications; limits or listens in on phone calls; sabotages victims car; restricts outside interests; frequently moves, requires victim to remain inside the house; restricts access to mail; deprives a person of friendships.
Physical: The abuser beats, bites, chokes, grabs, hits, kicks, pinches, pulls hair, punches, pushes, restrains, scratches, shakes, shoves, slaps, excessively tickles, twists arms, uses weapons, spanks, smothers, trips, etc.
Physical Neglect: The abusive parent/caregiver fails to provide minor with adequate food, clothing, medical care, and protection.
Emotional Neglect: The abusive parent/caregiver fails to provide affection or psychological care, abuses spouse in child’s presence, gives child permission to use drug’/alcohol.
Educational Neglect: The abuser fails to provide for the educational needs of a child, and/or allowing chronic truancy.
Sexualized Relationship: The abuser has a sexualized interest in victim’s body, makes sexualized jokes, makes sexual comments, sexually harasses, discusses sexually activity, touches in an unwanted manner, or engages in an unwanted “romantic” pursuit.
Sexual: The abuser participates in voyeurism or exhibitionism; inflicts pornography; coerces or forces the victim into sexual activity; demands unwanted or bizarre sexual acts; physically attacks sexual body parts; treats the abused as a sex object; interrupts sleep for sex, or is extremely jealous.
Spiritual/Religious: The abuser has a preoccupation with spiritual authority and obedience, expresses own voice as God’s voice, has unspoken rules, enacts public punishment or rejection if he or she is challenged, maintains culture of pretend peace, has a lack of balance in Christian living.
Stalking: The abuser harasses the victim by persistently following him or her with no legitimate reason, arouses anxiety or fear or harm in the person being followed, or pursues the victim in an unwanted “romantic” pursuit. A stalker may also engage in harassing telephone calls, computer communications, texting, letter, writing, etc.
Psychological: The abuser participates in verbal aggression, dominant, controlling, or jealous behaviors. He or she may also barrage the abused with a sustained and repetitive pattern of insults, putdowns, arbitrary and unpredictable inconsistencies, or cyber-bullying. This type of abuse is associated with situations of power imbalance.
Verbal: The abuser puts down, orders, corrects, denounces, ignores, yells, insults, curses, maintains an attitude of entitlement to abusive behavior, engages in constant criticism.
Economic: The abuser limits the victim’s financial independence by preventing him or her from working, etc. Or by preventing the victim from using financial resources, controlling the budget, or requiring an accounting for every penny spent.
Stonewalling: The abuser uses silence as a weapon, avoids answering questions, halts a conversation, repeats inconsequential information, repeats phrases, refuses to change opinion or perception, evades but avoids overt deception.
Threats: The abuser verbally threatens the victim with violence or physically threatens the victim with physical conduct, hand gestures, raised fists, actual physical contact, a sign or graffiti.
Intimidation: The abuser intimidates with physical contact, physical blocking, emotional manipulation, verbal abuse, purposeful embarrassment, physical assault, epithets, derogatory comments, slurs, lewd propositions, touching in an offensive manner, creating derogatory posters or cartoons.
Humiliation: The abuser asserts power over another person through hostile humor, public humiliation, or criticism. The abuser might belittle the victim’s appearance, parenting, or domestic skills. Erotic humiliation, such as spanking, is a form of psychological humiliation whereby one person gains arousal or erotic excitement from humiliating another.
Patriarchy: The abuser as husband/father, sees himself as the supreme authority; he asserts spiritual authority in terms of power with emphasis on submission or obedience, disregards feelings or opinions of children or a female partner, shows contempt for emotion, elevates the needs of women and children.
Passive Aggression: The abuser is unable to express anger in a healthy way and so uses ambiguous communication patterns-rarely meaning what he or she says, pretends to forget or acts confused as a way to avoid personal responsibility, blames others, acts in an accommodating way but inwardly is resentful, rarely follows through with promises.
Property Violence: The abuser destroys (or threatens to destroy) property, punches walls, smashes objects, breaks down doors, pounds on tables or doors, abuses or threatens to harm pets, creates graffiti.